May 5, 2025

As a leader, where should your influence begin?

Leaders wanting to make an impact beyond their lifetimes - it began at home. Before anything else, take responsibility for the life of your family. When leaders put their families first, the community benefits; starting at home is always the key to positively affecting others.

Contrary to what many teach, leadership in the home is not about power or control. It means giving up yourself for someone else and assuming responsibility for the health and development of your relationships.

Recently, I read Bob Benson's poem Laughter in the Walls, which captures the essence of spending time together in laughter as a family.

"I pass many houses on my way home –some pretty, some expensive, some inviting – but my heart always skips a beat when I turn down the road and see my house nestled against the hill.

I am especially proud of the house and its appearance because I drew the plans myself.

It started large enough for us—I even had a study—and two teenage boys now reside there.

And it had a guest room – my girl and nine dolls are permanent guests.

It had a small room, which Peg had hoped would be her sewing room—the two boys swinging on the Dutch door had claimed it as their own.

So, it doesn’t look like I am much of an architect right now. But it will get larger again –one by one they will go away to work, to college, to service, to their own houses, and then there will be room – a guest room, a study, and a sewing room for just the two of us.

But it won’t be empty – every corner, every room, every nick in the coffee table will be crowded with memories.

Memories of…picnics, parties, summers, fires, winters, going barefoot, leaving for vacation, getting home from vacation, conversations, black eyes, graduations, first dates, balls games, arguments, washing dishes, bicycles, dogs, boat rides, meals, and a thousand other things that fill the lives of those who would raise five.

And Peg and I will sit quietly by the fire and listen to the laughter in the walls."

When the children are gone, what will you hear in your walls?

We are here for a very short while. How will you be remembered? As someone angry, screaming, and bitter? Or as lovable, laughable, and joyful people? May our laughter echo strongly in the walls of our homes, and our influence be worth remembering, replicating, and leaving inside the hearts of those we love!

Remember, with grace, we're all rough drafts of the people we're still becoming!

Intentionally Own It! What personalized growth does this message encourage me to pursue, and why does it matter? When will I take action, and what value will it add to my life and the lives of others when I do?